Post by ice on Dec 23, 2008 12:23:22 GMT -5
P E T E R xEustacex Z I K E M A N
-face claim: Nolan Gerard Funk-
I’ve been dancing for… 16-and-a-half years.
And though I’m a boy I do a dead on Liza Minneli *impression.*
When it comes to love, I can swing either way but boys rock my world.
Oh. And you can just call me Pete.
You love ‘em, you hate ‘em—
Family quarrels are bitter things. They don't go by any rules. They're not like aches or wounds; they're more like splits in the skin that won't heal because there's not enough material. ~F. Scott Fitzgerald
I’ve got these two stuck-up no-good pompous parents that are ashamed they ever had a gay son. I suppose that’s why I even pretend I’m bi, to give them a little hope I might settle down with a wife and have three grandchildren they could be proud of. As for siblings, I have a feeling they’re trying to get pregnant again, as to make up for the large disappointment I am. Well they can suck it, cuz I kick ass.
The kids that get me through the day—
"Friends are God's ways of apologizing for our families." ~ Anonymous
"Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one." ~ C.S. Lewis
I’ve got some killer friends but the one that deserves the first mention is of course, Temperance. She’s been my bud forever and I know her better than I know myself, vice versa. I can always depend on her when I need to do a serious parent bashing, or if some lowlife decides to make fun of me because I’m not as straight as an arrow. Rainbows are prettier people. Why doesn’t anyone see that?
And of course, I have to mention Paul, who I think even I had a crush on when I first saw him. He’s not gay but if he was… *wink* Anyway, while Temp brings the comfort and the cookies, he brings the beatdown. Mess with me and Paul will fix you up right nice. So it helps to have (as my parents would say) a ‘real’ man around. Like I need that.
And of course, there’s Mr. A, though I call him Nel. I think I’m the only kid he lets do that- yay me! He gives me tips, words of advice, and he’s always blunt and honest. I appreciate that so so much. I wouldn’t be half the person I was without him.
Skills/Qualifications
"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, “I used everything you gave me.”
So I was there when Temp emerged from her little shell and became the actress she is today. And some of her passion and talent must have leaked onto me because I sprang to the challenge right when it was presented to me. No way she was leaving me behind. At first, everyone thought I was just taking the lessons and watching the movies because Temperance was doing it first, and I didn’t want to get left behind. Well, they’re wrong. As Dolly Parton said “Find out who you are and do it on purpose.” I found myself in the shimmering dress of Chita Rivera. And I followed in her footsteps.
We used to practice in her bedroom, every day, for three hours. Temp would shut her door and turn up the volume on her stereo. Then we’d take turns either singing along, or dancing on top of her bed. The other would sit and watch and critique the performance. I’ll never forget what Temp said every time.
“That was good Pete, but the world has too much good in it. We need badass.” And we were only five or six at the time! But she was so inspirational that I gave her what she was looking for. We kept doing our little routines over and over, until Temp’s parents knocked on the door and told us to shut it. Then we’d roll on the floor, laughing, before sneaking out of her room and stealing the mother’s make-up as punishment.
I think I finally managed to outshine Temp when it came to our dance lessons. It took her a long time to get a routine down perfect. But me? I got it down pat the third or fourth run through. I still remember most of my routines. It’s good that I got dance, because singing—yikes!—was harder. I can belt out many a note now, but once I sounded like a broken record. It took a bunch of persistence to learn how to read music and tell the difference between an A and a C. Maybe I was tone deaf—but I rose about it nonetheless.
Like Temp, I took those horseback riding lessons with her. I took fencing. I was there for acting, of course, and we both appeared in this cute little commercial when we were five I think. I would have taken piano with her too, but her parents decided they had to draw the line between us somewhere. And then, there is my special ability that makes Peter Eustace Zikeman extra awesome.
My mom can change her features so she looks like someone else. My father is a hypnotist—his power lies in his voice. Combine them and what do you got? Me! I can sound like someone else. Vocal Impersonations. I can imitate anything, anytime, anywhere. I can do the ventriloquist thing and I can throw my voice, but those aren’t as fun as just creeping everyone out with a teacher’s voice. It’s extremely useful when it comes to acting. And now that I know how to use my voice, I’ve sang female parts in perfect pitch. Gosh, I love it so much.
Oh I forgot to mention one thing. This isn’t really a talent, just a hobby. I love to memorize quotes from people and bust them out when the moment is right. You never know when you need a good quote.
One-on-one with Peter E. Zikeman.
Cute is when personality shines through looks. Like, in the way they walk. Everytime you see them you just wanna run up and hug ‘em—anonymous.
An interview between Temp (T) and Pete.(P)
T: First of all, I can’t believe you’re making me do this. This is ridiculous.
P: Just read the questions I’ve written down already. Come on, this is fun! You can pretend your Katie Couric! Or Oprah!
T: Pfft, Oprah is so two years ago. Ellen was voted #1 talk show host. I can’t believe you missed that.
P: If you want to be Ellen, get out of that skirt and into my slacks. Here, we can switch, I’m sure I can pull off that color better anyway.
T: Har har. Fine, I’ll be Oprah. *shuffling of papers* So, tell us, we’re dying to know—what makes Peter tick?
P: Oh, you’re such a doll. Really, I’m a very simple person. I like what everyone likes. Success, lovely friends—
T: Oh stop it.
P: —an overbearing family that squashes all your hopes and dreams. I would say I’m really a very ambitious person and my family has something to do with that. I’ve never been one to just quit. I persist ‘till the very end! Maybe it was when my mother said I couldn’t do this or couldn’t do that, that I realized that I really wanted to do ‘this’ or ‘that.’ The more people said I couldn’t the more I wanted it and the harder I tried. It just shows you can’t knock me down.
T: Would you say that you’re kind of a rebel then?
P: Hell yes! I love pissing off my parents! I get a hoot out of seeing their horrified faces when they learn that their son is starring in a new play as the female lead! It rarely happens, but when a director comes along who realizes that non-traditional casting can bring out the best in the musical, I jump at the chance! I’m more of a rebel out of the theatre world too. Though I know I shouldn’t mess with the teachers, sometimes it’s just too fun to call them out of class as the ‘principal.’ I’m really good at prank calls too. I once carried on a conversation with these preps because they thought I was Jerome King! Good times, good times. I love laughs, so I suppose that’s why I enjoy comedies better then any other type of theatre.
T: How charming. Though I believe dramas have more substance—
P: Did I ask for Oprah’s opinion?
T: You should have. Anyway… er.. how do you prepare for your roles?
P: Unlike Temp here, I don’t obsess.
T: I am not obsessive.
P: Hush, hon, I’m talking. I like to walk into an audition, relaxed and ready to roll, with a piece prepared. I put down more than one choice so they know that I’m flexible when it comes to the parts I play. When I get the role, I usually stay in character for a while. I explore the character to some depths and they sorta become a part of me. I swear I still have traces of Conrad Birdie in me. I evolve and become a different person everytime that I take on a character. Some people say that I’m easily shaped, like clay, but I like to think I’m just… flexible. I’ve always been a go-with-the-flow kind of guy.
T: And… wait, what? Someone thinks a lot of himself.
P: Just read it.
T: Oookay. How are you handling the pressure of your ‘growing’ fan base?
P: First of all, the sarcasm is not appreciated. Anyway! I’ve been good under different types of pressure. Like, autographs, flash photography, I can handle most of that. But tests and homework? Argggh, I crumble under the weight of paperwork so fast! I’m not the smartest kid out there so I actually have to try to get relative good grades. Unlike Temp, who just has to go through the tests and guess on everything.
T: HEY! I study..! A little! And it’s not my fault that the my Imopp helps me out every now and then…
P: Every now and then?! You can’t control you’re frikkin’ Imopp! It’s unfair, really.
T: Solstice encourages us to use and develop our powers. I’m just exercising my right as a student.
P: You’re hopeless. “I would prefer even to fail with honor than to win by cheating.” Sophocles said that.
T: “Nothing resembles an honest man more than a cheat.” That’s a French proverb, my friend.
P: *gasp* You did not just outquote me! Peter is NEVER outquoted! *tackles*
T: *screams* GET HIM OFF GET HIM OFF.
*after much laughing, rolling around, pinching and kicking, Temperance and Peter pick up the papers to end the interview on a proper note.*
T: In summary, *Clears throat* Peter Eustace Schneider is an ambitious, talented man, who takes life as it comes, rather than obsessing over the little details of things. He’s more of a class clown than anything else, but he’s a great friend who I’m happy to have.
P: Awwwww. I loveeee you Temp!
T: *rolls eyes* We’ll now have a short commercial break. Back after this.
Don’t hate me cuz I’m beautiful!
Do not judge from mere appearances; for the lift laughter that bubbles on the lip often mantles over the depths of sadness, and the serious look may be the sober veil that covers a divine peace and joy. The bosom can ache beneath diamond brooches; and many a blithe heart dances under coarse wool.-
Edwin Hubbel Chapin
What do I look like? Hm, I dunno. I guess I’m ‘cute’ enough, not bad-looking. Temp says I’m a looker and that’s kind of bad because girls have liked me before and I’m all like… “I’m gay, I’m sorry.” So I guess that that means I don’t look gay. But what does ‘gay’ look like anyway?
I’m fit because all of my dancing, but I’m not that tall—only 5’9, which is two or three inches taller then Temp. Of course I would like to be taller, but eh what can you do, y’know? I’m really skinny because I don’t eat much, yet I somehow manage to maintain my ‘figure,’ so I don’t look too sickly and twig-like. I’m pretty much just an average build, not really buff, though I’ve got the starts of a six-pack going. Something I am very proud of, by the way.
My best feature, in my opinion, is my hair. I love my hair! It’s brown, and recently I’ve tried out this new style, keeping it long so it passes my ears. I stole Temp’s hair dresser from her so of course I’ve got fabulous locks. I always wash my hair, at least once a day. Products=life. I’m telling you people, there has never been a boy obsessed this much with his hair. This, I promise you.
My eyes are hazel which basically means they are greenish-brownish, more brown than green. In certain lights, they can look yellow-ish and in others I’m told they’re bright and blue. I don’t pay much attention to the eyes because they can never make up their mind, so I don’t like bothering with them.
History
“History is filled with the sound of silken slippers going downstairs and wooden shoes coming up- Voltaire”
There isn’t much to say about my history. I guess I’ve scattered it throughout this entire bio. I was born a star and I plan to keep it that way. I met Temp and she brought it out of me. We had a great childhood though we’re both disappointments to our parents. And then, our powers emerged and we were shipped off here, where we met Paul. I wouldn’t change a thing about what has happened to me. I’ve been blessed with so many good people, that I don’t even care that I’m not exactly who my mom wants me to be. And so, I think it’s best to end in a quote—because, darlings, Peter Eustace Zikeman always ends with a quote. So here we go!
“Here’s to us, and to those like us!
Who are like us?
Damn few.”